Survived the first day

We survived the first day of school...both of us.

When I dropped Evan off he really looked a little terrified. When he got home in the afternoon, he wanted to tell me about his debate with his government teacher on the correct definition of communism. He spent a bit more time out of his room and when he did go in he left the door open a crack.

I handled my day differently than I might have a while back. Today I accepted that I was going to be a little worried. I did not let it consume me, but I also just gave myself permission to feel worried or sad. I called people, took walks, worked on a personal project.

From the outside it looks like a pretty boring day. Evan went to school; I did some writing; the younger boys played with friends; the respite girl went to her nurses' aide training class and then to work.

But it was a triumph. Evan lived through a school day without drugs, something he has not done in years; and I took care of myself emotionally: neither trying to force myself to feel what I thought I should or allowing the negative emotions rule my day.

I think I can safely say we both had a good day.