Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Margaret so "gets it"

So many of us when we first become adoptive or foster parents of older children say really naive things. We think only about how much we love the kids. We imagine how we will love these kids and make them all better.

But this new home thing is not all good from the kid's perspective. Even if your home is the most wonderful place in the whole world, it is still a new place. It is still a separation. It is still a move.

For the kids it is scary. They are leaving what they know and stepping into what they don't know.

And Margaret gets that. She is looking forward to bringing him home and she is thinking carefully about everything that he is going through, about what this is like for him.

But it shouldn't surprise us that she gets it.

She's his mom.


  1. And it starts with little ones too. Baby R was only 4 months old when he came to live with us but we did what we could to ease the transition. We brought the blanket and sheets for his bed so that he could sleep with them and get the house scents on them, the foster Mom packed up some clothes and receiving blanekts so that he could transition .. we still noticed some settling into his new house.

    It took him awhile even at that age to really settle into our routine. It was weeks before he kept looking at us strange.

  2. Thanks. I appreciate your vote of confidence!

  3. I couldn't agree more - it's been amazing to read about her journey.

  4. For us it was/is an experience like no other and one that while I thought we had prepared as well as possible for - was just something that until we started to come out the other side of it - we just couldn't even begin to understand the enormity of what it is/was like for our kids.

    I have been looking at pictures that we took of the kids during their first months here and now that I know them - I can see the tension, stress and fear in their faces, bodies and eyes.

    It is humbling to really get all that they have gone through and still will in the journey from one kind of family to another.

    Surreal too.


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