Monday, April 24, 2006

Coping with anxiety

The anxiety/reassurance dance.

Evan is anxious. I think I have mentioned that about a dozen times in my last couple of posts. He is realizing that staying clean is more difficult than he expected; he is afraid we will kick him out; he feels the need to reassure me that he is okay and that he is not as afraid as he is.

I am anxious. Why am I anxious? I am anxious about being anxious. If I get anxious: Evan will be more nervous; the kids will be stressed; and Hubby will suggest that we don't have to let Evan stay here indefinitely.

I have been trying to tell Hubby that I am the one making me tense, not Evan. I have to learn to cope with this for my own sake.

Actually this evening was much better. I got home and Evan was much more calm than he had been before. He said he walked the 4 blocks (one way) to the Driver's license bureau to get the information, and then walked further down town to pick up applications for jobs. He got three. He also talked to the alternative high school and is working on an educational plan.

I am hoping, of course, that he lower anxiety levels was from walking and accomplishing his goals for the day.

Still...at moments I feel like we are all learning a new dance. We are each of us anxious about getting our own steps right and nervous that if we mis-step we will trip someone else up and the whole family will tumble down around us.

Next on Evan

1 comment:

  1. It's anxiety making of course when we're not sure whether good behavior comes from sincere effort or is chemically induced.

    Take care of yourself.

    ReplyDelete

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