Saturday, January 31, 2009

My family

Brian went shopping with me today. We ran some errands. I bought him fast food lunch (shh...don't tell!). I was thinking about the comment that irritated me a few days ago. The substance of it was that it was not fair to the bioboys that we were doing care. I debate this with myself. I wonder in what ways the boys' lives are better or worse for having done it. I wonder what they would have been like had they grown up with just the two of them. It is difficult to imagine.

So in the car I said to Brian, "Do you ever think about what life would be like if we never did care?"

"No." (He's not much of a talker.)

"So do you think that it has mostly been good? Or...what are the bad parts?"

"I can't think of any bad parts."

"Not even Frankie?"

He gives a fake scream and then says, "I try to NEVER think about Frankie."

I smiled at him. We were quiet for a bit and at the next light I said, "So you don't mind sharing your family?"

He gave me that "how can you be such an idiot" look and said, "Mom, they ARE my family."


  1. I love that boy! Tears in my eyes for that comment.

  2. He said it all, didn't he?

  3. What a sweet kid. You are so blessed by your amazing family!!!

  4. What a great kid!

  5. I can't speak for your boys, but I know that growing up with my folks fostering was an amazing experience for me. From the outside, many of our extended family felt that it was "too hard" on me or "not fair", but from the inside, it felt pretty cool. There were occasional placements that were problematic (we did placements that were 3 months to 1 year, normally), but... my compassion for others and desire to help do what I can stems directly from that experience. If I had been old enough to help make the decision when my parents started care, I don't know what I would have said at the time. Looking back now, though, it's one of the best experiences I could have had. It wasn't "too hard", and I never felt like it was unfair. I suspect, from your comments, that your boys feel the same way and will continue to.

  6. what a sweet kid.

  7. Awww...that was so sweet.

  8. What a great kid. I left you an award over at my blog ;)


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