Sunday, May 03, 2009

Monthly Reports, at last

So I did one consolidated report for February, March and April.

I had to dig around for all the information regarding appointments, meds, and such. I searched my email and this blog. Blogs are very helpful for that sort of thing. Anyway, I got Gary's meds so I could type out all the names and dosages. Turns out he hasn't been taking them and isn't even clear on the instructions. So I made Gary get into the car ("no you can't wash your hair first, we are just going to talk to a pharmacist") to go to the drugstore.

We got it all worked out.

I'm pretty sure there is a rule that I am supposed to dispense medications. Brian is quite happy to have his father put his daily pill in a bowl on the table, but Gary (like the boys before him) insists he can do it himself. I understand their need for control and I give it to them. There is a risk, of course, but I think it is important for the boys to take responsibility and learn what happens when they don't.

I happened to mention in the report that he hasn't been remembering to take his meds, so if the social worker wants to tell me to do something else, I can.

In other news, Gary is still within a point of passing English, which is to say he is currently still failing. However, if he does everything he should from here to the end, he will pass. I think he will probably pass.

I hope so anyway.

He is very confusing about school. Whatever class he is in is either outrageously difficult, has a terrible teacher, or is too boring to care about. Classes he might take in the future will be easy, not an issue. He can do them, not a problem. None of them sound difficult to him at all.

He has trouble in classes now because he hates doing homework. It is difficult to concentrate, and large project overwhelm him and he doesn't get them done at all. Geometry however will be easy. He looked at Brian's book and he understands all of that. Brian says that a lot of people in the class are doing poorly because they don't do homework, but he will do homework! Of course he will. Just like he will in college. Even if the whole grade is based upon just 3 big projects, that will be easy! He will have so much time to get it done!

I don't think he perceives the tension in how he perceives the present and the future. I just nod.

Oh, Brian has flu-like symptoms, everything except the fever. We have isolated him in his room. It involved minimal bribing, which is an indication that he really does feel like crap.


  1. The "system" continues to fail teenager foster children in preparing them for adulthood...there are many, liability issues, disorganization, apathy, red tape, etc., but come out without having learned to be self reliant and if not having the tools required at least learning how to procure things for themselves. I admire how you are there to be supportive but let them learn from their own experiences knowing that you are still there as a safety net if they fall too hard...I'm learning to do that myself with my own daughter (I've realized that instead of letting natural consequences be a teaching tool I've come to the rescue one too many times so I'm crippling her).

    I see how you let them(all of them...not just foster) try to figure out how to get out of their own holes or present them with options but they still have to figure out the way out and I thought it would be easy but it's not...I'm getting the hang of it daughter just did something that caused the social workers to request that rooms be rearranged and in the past I would have stepped in and done the clean up. This time I'm watching her do it, get frustrated (because she's expecting me to do it) and remind her that she made this mess so she needs to clean it up...maybe by the time she's a teenager I'll have it pat...or I might be dead from the effort!LOL

    Not completely tied in to this post but since I don't know when I'll have a free hand to type I might as well use it now!LOL

  2. Kids. ::::rolling eyes::::: I love your lassiez faire parenting style. Good for the kids, to learn from reality.

  3. You know, my teen earned her honor of dispensing her meds to herself. It took me over a month to realize that that she hadn't asked for a refill from the pharmacy. It was a month of h*ll for both of us. She drove me nuts! Now I am back to dispensing them. Egads and heaven help us when she lives on her own and stops her meds without telling anyone.


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