Monday, March 12, 2007

Miss E is AWOL (updated)


I went to pick her up and called her cell phone from my car in the driveway. This has become our habit since she moved. At Annabelle's she was usually in the living room with the shades to the large window open so she could see me. If she did not come out after a few minutes I would call, and almost always the response would be "I'm on my way. I just have to find my keys/get a book/do something." Rarely, although with increasing frequency, I would wake her up.

I have had to wake her every day at Marsha's. Marsha is, I know, up getting other kids ready for school. I don't know if she makes any attempt to wake up Miss E or if she just lets her do it herself. I regard her not working hard to wake Miss E up as a good sign. Miss E is difficult to live with. Picking your battles would be important.

Today though she did not answer either of my two calls. I was about to call Marsha when Miss E called me back. She was calling from her cell phone. She was surprised, didn't I get the message she left on my cell phone last night? She decided to go to the gym this morning. She was right at that very minute walking across the street so that she would not be late for school.

I think there is about a 5% chance she is not lying to me. Even if she was able to drag her butt out of bed that early, who would drive her? It was a more plausible lie when she lived with Annabelle. Annabelle had to leave for work at 5:30am. Of course there was no message on my cell phone.

I'm sad. Years ago I would be angry at being lied to. I used to get offended at even small lies. I never thought that would be something I wouldn't consider worth fighting about. Now teenagers tell me lies, and even when I see right through them I just say, "okay."

When they are kids who live with me I will sometimes have fun messing with them. If a kid told me they were at the gym I would, for instance, ask with enthusiasm if they would pick up a new schedule for swimming classes so that I could sign Brian up. Often they knew what was going on. I was saying, "I know you are lying to me, and I am not going to fight with you about it."

But what is going on here, or at least probably going on, is that she did not come home last night. Annabelle said that Miss E had been spending weekends with her older sister, contrary to the wishes of her state worker. The last time I heard the "going to the Y" story it was cover for that. That time she did end up going home. I dropped her off at school, but she cut that day anyway.

The last few months before emancipation are often so difficult.

I can't help but feel so sad for her.

Update: I got confirmation from Marsha. Miss E did not come home last night. I don't know if she was home home for any part of the weekend. Marsha and I do not have any sort of relationship yet and so she doesn't share much with me. That's okay. She's the mom. It was my choice to stay "just the driver."

I have visions of this being just like David.


  1. I'm sorry, it is tough.

  2. It's so hard to stand by and watch it happen. I wish she could realize how much people really do care about what happens to her.

  3. Dammit. I was hoping she would last there.


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