Sunday, July 15, 2007

Andrew & Evan reprise

Last summer I pulled together emails I wrote early in Evan's time with us. I just went back to see what I wrote about Evan and Andrew almost two years ago. For those of you who don't want to read the posts, I will summarize. Evan and Andrew did not get along.

Both liked to debate. Both hated to loose. Evan was used to winning though being louder than anyone else. Andrew uses logic leading people into argumentative dead ends. Evan complained that Andrew did not like him and Andrew complained, well, that he did not like Evan. As far as Andrew was concerned, Evan could fall off the face of the earth and he would breath a sigh of relief.

For a while I tried to help them understand each other. Finally I gave up and let them work it out themselves. Andrew dealt with it by avoiding all contact with Evan. They divided the house up like a couple of tom cats. I kept taking deep breaths and thinking they just had to make it until the end of the school year. Evan was supposed to be with us for only 10 months or so.

Sobriety did wonders for Evan's personality and after he came back from rehab he and Andrew just started getting along.

I just went to Andrew's room to talk to him about the possibility of our getting another kid and where Evan might sleep when he wanted to come home from school for vacations or just because he needed a weekend out of the dorm. Andrew didn't think about it. He just said, "He can share my room."

You know 18 months ago it would have been, "I can't stop you from letting him stay in the house. Just keep him away from me."


  1. I tried to leave a comment on your guestbook to ask to be invited to read your private blog. It wouldn't accept any posts so I thought I would ask you here.

    My hubby and I are foster parents in Virginia and I was searching for foster care blogs. I sometimes feel that foster parents are on isolated islands of their very own. :o)

    Thank you for your consideration. I look forward to reading more from you!


  2. I will see if I can fix the guest book. In order to send you an invitation I have to have your email address. Mine is

    pflagfostermom at gmail dot com


Comments will be open for a little while, then I will be shutting them off. The blog will stay, but I do not want either to moderate comments or leave the blog available to spammers.