Saturday, February 27, 2010

Opposite of Freaked

After school yesterday Roland went down to the rec room with a measuring tape. After dinner he went out to an office supply store. Later I took a deep breath and asked what he was working on.

He explained that he figured out how to rearrange the rec room so that Andrew could have a partitioned-off section for his bedroom when he was here. He wanted some sort of movable partition so that we could store it when he was gone. Of course the large sofa the boys had got at a yard sale would have to go, but the love seat he had put in our bedroom could take its place. He had also been pricing desks since I would have to have one if Gary's sister took the room I now sort of share with Andrew.

"You know that it is unlikely that she will move in, right?"


"Because Gary doesn't think he wants her to move in. The agency is really good about making sure siblings have regular contact even if they don't live together. If Gary thinks it would be too much stress, they find a different home for her."

"Oh, right now he's just feeling overwhelmed!"

Um ... I don't know what to say.


  1. I have a feeling Roland is spot on.

  2. I must admit I am glad to see Roland is embracing this unexpectant life changing event as opposed to freaking out about it. Rather it happens or not, at least he has thought about it and thought it through and is preparing to take care of things if the need should arise. I tend to semi-agree with Roland about Gary feeling overwelmed. It might be that over time the more time he spends with her the more he WANTS to be with her. Right now it might just be a VERY sudden and unepexcted change coupled with the TPR hearing taking place and he doesn't know what to do, or how to feel and has very mixed emotional feelings about it all. It could be having his sister around reminds him A LOT of how life USED to be and might be painful for him right now. He might have to learn to accept what's going on before he can embrace her newly founded presence. I don't know I'm just guessing. I can't imagine the variety of emotions he's feeling, along with the upWQs and downs of trying to deal with and accept what is going on now that things are finalized. Like anything though these things take time, but now that they are over the healing can begin. Lil' bit by lil' bit. With all do respect I'm not telling you anything you don't already know. I do wish all of you nothing, but luck as these tough, sometimes life altering decisions are made. God Bless.

  3. Whoa. That's full on. I'm glad he's not freaked out, but that's pretty freaky in itself. At least you'll know if you could manage it and what changes would need to happen. I'm sure with time and some more contact between them it will all be clearer.

  4. I get it. I can't really decide something like that until I've worked out how to make it happen without extra stresses.

    It may happen, it may not. But, the idea that your son's sister is someone you can't say no to is great and it sounds like Roland shares it.

  5. I get it too, usually I'm the one who needs to get the possibility all worked out in my head.

    Roland is a nester though. He likes to buy furniture (used) and create comfy spaces. Well, comfortable to him. I like open space I am always walking around a new comfy chair.

    Right now I am really not sure what is best for them, they do need to meet first.

  6. I always need a plan whether it comes to fruition or not.


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